“Furthermore it has been said, ‘Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.’ But I say to you that whoever divorces his wife for any reason except sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery; and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery. (Matthew 5:31-32)
We studied about adultery in the previous lesson (see THE GOSPEL: "You Shall Not Commit Adultery" Lesson). Jesus' lessons on adultery and divorce go hand-in-hand. Now it came to pass, when Jesus had finished these sayings, that He departed from Galilee and came to the region of Judea beyond the Jordan. And great multitudes followed Him, and He healed them there. The Pharisees also came to Him, testing Him, and saying to Him, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for just any reason?” And He answered and said to them, “Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning ‘made them male and female,’ and said, ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’ [Genesis 2:18-25]? So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.” (Matthew 19:1-6; Mark 10:1-9)
God never intended for marriages to end in divorce, because they are no longer two but one flesh. They said to Him, “Why then did Moses command to give a certificate of divorce, and to put her away?” He said to them, “Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, permitted you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. (Matthew 19:7-8) The first time divorce is mentioned in the scriptures is in Leviticus, one of the books of the laws of God. Prior to God allowing Moses to permit divorce, men were "getting rid" of their wives for just any reason; then if they later changed their mind, they would attempt to claim their rights over their ex-wives again. In order to stop this from happening, bills of divorce were issued. (read Hebrew Law, 5. Divorce)
In the house His disciples also asked Him again about the same matter. So He said to them, “Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her. And if a woman divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery.” (Mark 10:10-12; Matthew 19:9; Luke 16:18) Now to the married I command, yet not I but the Lord: A wife is not to depart from her husband. But even if she does depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband. And a husband is not to divorce his wife. (I Corinthians 7:10-11) Eventhough a husband and wife may separate, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate. When we understand exactly what marriage is in the eye of God, it makes it a lot more difficult to simply just get a divorce, regardless of what may have happened or is happening in the relationship.
His disciples said to Him, “If such is the case of the man with his wife, it is better not to marry.” But He said to them, “All cannot accept this saying, but only those to whom it has been given: ... He who is able to accept it, let him accept it.” (Matthew 19:10-12) It is good for a man not to touch a woman. Nevertheless, because of sexual immorality, let each man have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband. Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise also the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. But I want you to be without care. He who is unmarried cares for the things of the Lord—how he may please the Lord. But he who is married cares about the things of the world—how he may please his wife. (I Corinthians 7:1-5, 32-33)
Since God made us in His image, we all naturally have a desire to be in relationships. That's why God gave us the 5th - 10th commandments, to help us understand how to behave in the various relationships we will have. (see Christ Fulfills the Commandments) Yes, it's better not to be married, so that we can care for the things of the Lord—how we may please the Lord; but it's very unlikely that we will abstain from relationships of any kind with the opposite sex. (see Other Piece of the Puzzle) However, there may be a situation that arises which may make it necessary for a married couple to separate and possibly divorce, because There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. (I John 4:18)
What could possibly be the allowable reason? Sexual immorality! God explains through most of the books of Jeremiah, Ezekiel and Hosea that ...for all the causes for which backsliding Israel had committed adultery, I had put her away and given her a certificate of divorce; (Jeremiah 3:8) But later, Isreal repented, O Israel, return to the Lord your God, For you have stumbled because of your iniquity; Take words with you, And return to the Lord. Say to Him, “Take away all iniquity; Receive us graciously, for we will offer the sacrifices of our lips." (Hosea 14:1-2) And God forgave them, and .... reconciled with them; “I will heal their backsliding, I will love them freely, For My anger has turned away from him." (Hosea 14:4) How is reconciliation possible, after adultery? Because the offender repents, stops committing adultery and sincerely asks the one they offended to forgive them; “Assuredly, I say to you, all sins will be forgiven the sons of men, and whatever blasphemies they may utter;" (Mark 3:28) And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you. (Ephesians 4:32; Colossians 3:12-14)
However, it takes three to make a marriage work: God, husband and wife (I Corinthians 11:3). Can two walk together, unless they are agreed? (Amos 3:3) And if a house is divided against itself, that house cannot stand. (Mark 3:25) Divorce may end up being the final resolution: If any brother has a wife who does not believe, and she is willing to live with him, let him not divorce her. And a woman who has a husband who does not believe, if he is willing to live with her, let her not divorce him. But if the unbeliever departs, let him depart; a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases. But God has called us to peace. (I Corinthians 7:12-13, 15) If the spouse is an unbeliever and leaves and files for divorce, this also frees the spouse who was left, free to remarry without a guilty conscience of being considered an adulterer by God. The only other reason would be the death of a spouse: For the woman who has a husband is bound by the law to her husband as long as he lives. But if the husband dies, she is released from the law of her husband. So then if, while her husband lives, she marries another man, she will be called an adulteress; but if her husband dies, she is free from that law, so that she is no adulteress, though she has married another man. (Romans 7:2-3) A wife is bound by law as long as her husband lives; but if her husband dies, she is at liberty to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord. (I Corinthians 7:39) Just make sure to leave the time of the spouse's permanent departure up to God!
The lessons of Jesus' "Sermon on the Mount"! Refer to the previous lessons, to study the entire sermon in context:The "Beattitudes" Lesson!; "Salt & Light" Lesson!; Importance of The Commandments!; "You Shall Not Murder" Lesson!; "You Shall Not Commit Adultery" Lesson!; 'Til Divorce Do Us Part?; Watch Our Mouth, and Responses!; Don't Be A Hypocrite, A Show-off!; God and His Kingdom First!; Don't Judge; Be An Example!; Follow The Leader!; Not Just Hearers, but Doers Also!
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